The Year of No Expectations

I know that the title "The Year of No Expectations" may sound a little depressing at first, but I am here to assure you that having no expectations is a beautiful thing.  Allow me to explain.  You see, like many of us, I tend to start each year by making some resolutions, which inevitably lead to positive expectations about what these resolutions might bring.  There is nothing wrong with having positive expectations for the year.  I am very much a proponent of positive thinking and its effects on positive outcomes.  However, where I have made a mistake in the past is in focusing only on these expectations and forgetting to take time to enjoy the experiences that lead to these outcomes.

I can think of no greater example of this than myself at the start of 2012.  You see, for the last three years I, along with my two brothers, had been looking forward to 2012 as the year we finally get to New York.  So when the clock struck midnight on the night of December 31, 2011, my brothers and I couldn't help but enter the year with nothing but the highest of expectations.  After finishing what proved to be a very successful school year, we would be off to live in the greatest city in the world.  Once there, we would only excel further in our careers and finally achieve all that we had dreamed.

So as the year progressed, I found myself driven by the goal of living in New York by the summer and having it consume just about everything I did.  The bros and I always talked about needing to get "New York ready" and this meant kicking as much ass as possible at work, getting into our best physical shape, and saving over $20,000 to be able to afford the move.  After finally getting New York ready, we achieved our dream and I arrived in New York City the morning of July 22, 2012.

The five months that followed were a roller coaster in every sense of the word.  Getting an apartment proved harder than any of us could have imagined and getting a job wasn't much easier.  Luckily, I was able to get an amazing job teaching 2nd and 3rd grades at Empower Charter School, in Crown Heights, Brooklyn.  I loved my time there and I feel I grew as a teacher more in those months than perhaps in all my previous experience combined.  This growth, however, came with a high level of stress.  The hours, when combined with travel time, were more than I'd ever worked and I found myself with very little time to enjoy the city where I'd always dreamed of living.

The brothers were also struggling, with long hours and inconsistent schedules.  After long discussion, we finally realized that we were exerting far too much energy in maintaining a life in New York than taking care of our personal well-being and enjoying day to day life.  We had pursued New York as the be all/end all for so long that once we achieved it we were willing to do anything to stay there.  When in all actuality, we had lost some of the passion that drove us to Brooklyn in the first place.  In the end, for me, it was my career as an educator that truly drives what I do and I realized that I enjoyed that pursuit much more in Salt Lake City than I did in Brooklyn.  At some point I realized that rather than chase a destination, it was time to let my passion be my guide.

Which leads me to right now, the afternoon of January 3, 2013.  I am back living in Salt Lake City and am excited to get back into the classroom.  With getting into a classroom being the only exception, I really have no other expectations for 2013.  I've learned that things are going to work out the way they're supposed to and all I can do is try to make the greatest positive impact possible.  I know that the educational field is where I've been able to make the biggest difference and as long as I follow this path I will be just fine.  And I look forward to doing this in a place that I've been honored to call home for the last 31 years (with  5 months off, of course), The SLC.  I have found no greater place to enjoy the day to day with no expectations.